June 27, 2011

Mildly late for dinner.

Hi all you mild ones,

Sorry I've been so absent from these here blog pages.

Not really sure what happened. Perhaps something about my cat getting insanely ill and me having to completely put my life on hold to do things like SHOP FOR BABY FOOD (to see if she would eat it since she was on some sort of hunger strike) and LEARN FROM A MALE CAT-NURSE HOW TO GIVE HER A CAT I.V.

Lets just say that nothing screams mild like a CAT I.V. hanging somewhere in your apartment.

The poor little cat-dude has started to eat on her own. I on the other hand may need to take out a loan to ever buy food for myself again. It costs a lot of money to rock the mild cat lady style sometimes. Especially when your cat is like 100 years old.


Just to clarify in case you weren't sure, things have still be really really mild.

1. Text conversation this morning between a longtime bff and I:

How is dating life?

Let's just say I'm drinking day old iced coffee alone in bed waiting to see BAD TEACHER with a female friend. That's my current dating report.

I really wanna see that movie! Sometimes day old coffee alone in bed is better than any guy.

2. My friend, Lan and I shared a bloody mary and french fries today. "Hangover cure" it was called by the female bartender from Virginia. The thing is, I can mildly see myself ordering that on a not-hungover day...

3. Last night, I took this photo of my arm-candy, Jun (just posting that to see if he's reading this!) and my grad school bff, Patrick...You know, two adult men LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY OVER MARU CAT VIDEOS AT A BAR ON A SATURDAY NIGHT. Truly, MEN GONE MILD.

4. Speaking of men gone mild, all I wanted to do is listen to the Strokes today. I think I've got PMS GONE MILD and it's making me go CRAZY.

5. I can't believe how mild I am when I get drunk. Last night, I came home ALONE from a DJ gig and seriously proceeded to eat Taco Bell (please pass no judgement--it was late and we all make mistakes) and surf the internet. I can see in my history all these NERDY things I looked at which I now have vague memories of. GOOGLE GONE MILD. Also, now that I have a Smart Phone (OK, I have for like 5 years) I sometimes Wikipedia what's in drinks WHILE AT THE BAR. Bars Gone Mild.

6. I totally made an appointment for something called SOUND HEALING on Friday that involves Reiki. In case you weren't sure, I am sometimes NEW AGE GONE MILD.

7. Today on Facebook, someone's status simply proclaimed "Tater Tots!" to which I commented "WHAT'S NOT TO LIKE!" MMMild.

8. This might be the most mild email thread (I started OBVIOUSLY) in the history of the world:

Because obviously when the night reaches SINGLE GIRL 'O CLOCK, it's customary to mass email your friends your DREAM WEDDING DRESS. No big deal, everyone. P-Mild-S.

9. If you live in L.A. then you probably know that the 405 is going to close for over TWO DAYS next month, thus coining my mildly new favorite term:


10. If you are really mild, you probably have done online dating. In which case, you know:


Seriously, people, CHECK OUT THAT BLOG. Hilarious.

11. If I was ever going to make a MEN OF MILD sexy calendar, I would definitely put Jason Segel on the cover. Just sayin.

12. I have such beyond mild fear of spiders that I can't even Google them because even seeing them ON MY COMPUTER SCREEN makes me scream.

13. I think a guy was trying to SEXT with me the other night and when he asked what I was doing (it was like midnight), I texted back "Watching Degrassi High". I COULDN'T LIE. I'm too mildlicious for him anyway.

14. This seems like the greatest mild invention since...well...the Snuggie. But my question is, do we have something like this in L.A. yet?! Mild minds need to be able to SLEEP ANYWHERE THEY WANT TO SLEEP. And lets face it, summertime makes it mildly too hot to nap in your car.

Until next time...

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